This and That The "flats?" 101012

This and That  The Flats?  101012

Weariness?  Dole-drums?  Numbness?

Ever have one of those days - weeks maybe even months when though you know the know the joy of the Lord, you just don't feel it?  It's like being at Disneyworld with a bad cold.  You know it's wonderful and you ought to have a good time but it's just out of reach.  I call this, "the flats."

It's not a "valley," and certainly not a "mountaintop," it's just flat.  You are unmotivated and seemingly unaffected concerning anything related to he faith.  Everything you thing about doing seem artificial and manipulative.  OK - maybe depressed is a good word but I know depression and this is not it.  It's just, "the flats."

So, that's where I am today and where I was yesterday.  I've tossed it up to the throne room and given it consideration and attention and even reviewed all my highlights in my reading to try and find out where this is coming from.

I'd almost say that I don't care - but I do.  I'd almost say I was failing in faithfulness but my practices are still important to me.  I'd say I was under oppression but that's a little strong.  I'm just in the "flats."

But in looking for the source of the flatishness I am hard pressed to discover it.   God is providing well and faithfully for us.  He even blessed us with the means to replace Patti's, computer so she can work on her photography.  Folks are reading my blog - or at least visiting it.  The Bible Study and care group are going well.  So I am not able to discover anything that would be the source of the flats.

So, I wonder if what I am experiencing is, well, contentment.  Oh, according to the "world's" measure and the fleshes expectations, thing are pretty awful.  But apart from that everying is AOk - even good.

I wonder if, because we allow the world and the flesh to have such impact on our hearts, we get used to living in a crisis state which becomes our norm.  I wonder if, becasue we are so prone to be faithful when times are tough and lax when things are good that we actually (somehow) create crisis for ourselves so we can go to and feel close to God.

Let me give you an example.  We went to shop for Patti's computer.  Now usually I go nuts in a store with lots of gadgets and gizmos.  So, while Patti was looking and considering and wearing down the salesguy I went to peruse all the latest and geatest goodies on offer.  I actually got bored.  As I looked at the goodies I kept asking, "What does this do that what God has alrady provided doesn't do?  Well, there were a goodly number of things the new goodies do.  But, they are things I don't do - or don't need to do.  That's when I first notices the flats.
I realized that i didn't "need" anything and that I really had no "wants."  Sickly, that bummed me out.  It was a shock - and a shock I'm still getting over.  I was content?

OK, let's suppose what I am experienceing is contentment.  I have to say that if it is, I have never experienced it before.  Ever.  What used to be a big deal - isn't.  What used to seem important, isn't.  The allure of the latest gizmo and gadget isn't.

Let's see:
I'm not worried about having our need met.
I'm not bummed because I can't get new goodies.
I'm not even impressed with the new goodies.
I'm beginning to not be able to understand wants.
I'm not into much TV if any.
I'm not fretting the election.
The work I have to do (all of it) is sufficient and honorable and satifying.

So - either I am terribly depressed or I am content.

I'm betting on content.  Why?
Well it's kind of a weird point.

James 1:14-16 But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. 15 Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. 16 Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers.  ESV

2 Peter 2:14b They have hearts trained in greed.  ESV

Maybe, just maybe, my desires have changed.  Maybe, just maybe, my heart is being retrained.

I'm on my second read of John Flavel's book, Keeping the Heart.  Maybe it's having an effect of which I was not aware.  Maybe it's true - good stuff in - good stuff out.  Maybe, as I "renew" my mind, my heart is affected more than I thought.

But I want to lay my money (haha) on contentment.  Not pridefully and certainly not due to anything I did but because God is working His promise in me as I work to fill my mind with wisdom and understanding.  All I can say is that I read a book - am reading it again and I'm seeing changes that I didn't choose or decide upon.

Maybe contentment is more a work of the Spirit than we think.  Maybe a lot of our attempts at being content are superfluous or at least minor elements.  Oh, I want to learn to be content and have prayed to learn but to be honest I was clueless as to how you got it.

Maybe (haha) there is really something to:

Phil 4:8&9  Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9 What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.   ESV