Ministered to in ministering to......

There are giants in these days, though the times are not such as to allow them room to display their gigantic strength; in many a humble cot, in many a crowded workshop, in many a village manse there are to be found men of the house of David, men after God’s own heart, anointed with the holy oil.   Spurgeon, Charles Haddon (2010-08-03). Till He Come - Enhanced Version (Kindle Locations 962-963). Christian Classics Ethereal Library. Kindle Edition.

I have found and am still finding that though the men and women of known faith – of public faith – are worthy counselors,  it is the guiet and humble believer whose voice is little heard from whom I receive my greatest blessings.  It is from their walks and especially their prayer that God richly blesses me.

They think themselves poor and weak and in need for all things and in doing so they keep their eyes, minds and hearts focused on the Lord who has promised them His friendship and care.  It is their clear awareness and humble acceptance of their deep and broad need for Him to be strong in every aspect of their lives that is a much needed and kindly given reproach to me.

They have a special sense of things not being Ok and a pervasive hunger to lean solely upon His grace, mercy and power.  They speak of His being the only provisions they trust.  They speak of Him “speaking” to them not in audible voices, though He can, but rather through the guidance of the Word and the Spirit as well as a surrender to listen.

There are two people and one family to who I have been blessed to minister of late.  And I laugh.  In their coming to me for encouragement and counsel it has been I who have been given such.  They have been His ministers in my live, His “come along side” earthly helpers who, utterly unaware of the work He is doing through them,  spread the message of His faithfulness and His deep desire for us to utterly depend upon Him.  They have shown me that it is only when I am distracted by the world, the flesh or perhaps the devil that I am cast down in myself, by myself.

One in particular recommended a book that has greatly impacted his walk.  Perhaps sensing my skepticism he finally bought me a copy of the book.  For weeks it lay by the sofa on my little table.  I couldn’t bring myself to read it but I couldn’t shelve it either.  So it sat.

Finally, a few days ago, out of a sense of obligation to acknowledge the gift, I picked it up and began to read.  I did not put it down until I have read it all.  Today, it is dog-eared and marked and waiting to have the notes transcribed.  It is directly impacting my perspective and especially my heart.

Did I learn something “new.”  Well, only if seeing the Way of faith through someone else’s eyes and heart is “new,”  yes.  No new truths were revealed in the book but the striking difference in the author’s perspective was a real conviction.  The reality of how simply and faithfully God works and moves in the truly dark places in the world was a smack in the back of the head.

I did my “due diligence” on the author and I was shocked at how little I could find.  I looked hard to find evidence to feed my skepticism but I could find none.  My big hurdle came from his claim to have fasted fo 70+ days while in prison and being beaten with great regularity.  My reaction, “Yeah, right, 70+ days??”

In the book he talks about that experience.  He tells us that he was not fasting to grow closer to the Lord or be released from prison.  Rather he was praying to die and to be released from what he was going through.  Does he then talk about how God’s will was for him to live and do a bunch of great things etc, etc, etc???  Nope.  He simply relates that he was wanting to die and be with the Lord and the Lord said, “Not now.”

What was so shocking to me was that I, in my own comfortable western way, have sought the same thing.  I have, in the depths of despondency and pain, lay on my bed and asked the Lord to take me home.  My situation, compared to his, is certainly a paltry and minor thing but I “knew” the feeling, the despair he writes about.  I too had “heard” the Lord’s, “Not now.”

Maybe it’s just me, and I hope so, but the danger of “professional pride,” or “seminary sanctity,” is very real to me.  I was taught that I was to have all the answers – I was the “pro.”  Well I work to make myself remember that I only know the one in whom all the answers are found, I have NO exclusive claim to those answers and He doesn’t always give them through me.

I have also learned that regardless of our western proclivity for order, structure and boxes He does not NEED them.  Not that they are wrong but rather, when they are not possible, He is not hindered in any way, shape or form.

I am learning that the Holy Spirit is much neglected (or hampered) by many of us (me too).  For whatever reason we shrink from Him hence we deprive ourselves of His ministry.  But when we allow aberrant and strange supposed manifestations of the Spirit to make us hesitant for His ministry it is akin to clogging an artery to our hearts.  Yet, Jesus Himself tells us the purpose and we see the might of the Spirit throughout the Word.  It is the Spirit that is the seal the provenance of our citizenship  in the Kingdom and it is the Spirit working in us that conforms us to His likeness.  Oh, we certainly are invited to help – but we must be very careful not to hinder.

Those of us who are called to the role of evangelist, shepherd or teacher must accept the purpose of our calling which is to equip the saints for works of – yep – ministry.  When we do we will find ourselves ministered to in ways we do not expect by the very ones we so equip.