EXTRA For we who fear, pray and work to fear rightly!

Sinful fear -- not uncommon - not good.

In his work, Triumphing Over Sinful Fear, John flavel writes some things that I have found convicting and heart breaking in my life.  Perhaps you will be blessed by his words as I was.  I highly recommend the book as a companion to scripture in these difficult times.  He writes of 3 kinds of fear, natural, sinful and holy --- well worth reading and following his guidance.

"Some fear more than they ought, some fear before they ought and others when they ought not at all.  The strong Christian fears God, not man.  The weak Christian fears man too much and God too little."

Based upon what we find in Hosea Flavel writes:
"But their eyes do not look to Me for protection and deliverance.  They expect more from Egypt than from heaven, more from a broken reed than from the Rock of Ages.  Do not fear their fear!  It drives them from Me to the creature.  It first distracts them, and then ensnares them.  In marked contrast, see that you and all the faithful in the land sanctify Me in your hearts, and make Me your fear and dread.  Rely upon Me by faith in this day of trouble.  See that you give Me the glory of My wisdom, power, and faithfulness by relying entirely upon My attributes that are engaged for you in so many tested promises.  Do not give yourself to sinful and vain dealings, as those who have no interest in Me nor experience of Me."

"Sinful fear will cause the best people to attempt to help themselves through sinful compromises."

Isa. 30:15-17a
"In a word, one act of faith will do them more good than Pharaoh and all his forces.  But they refuse to trust God."

"The sinfulness of fear lies in its exess and immoderacy when we fear more than we ought. . . . . Our fear exceeds the value and merit of its cause.  It is a great sin to love or fear any creature above its worth, as if it were master of all our temporal and eternal comforts."

"To trust in any creature as if it had God's power to help us, or to fear any creature as if it had God's power to hurt us, is exceedingly sinful."

Isa. 31:1
"It is a sinful and dangerous mistake to give to a creature that trust and dependence that belongs to God alone."

"Be careful not to fear any man, as if the power of making or marring you were in his hands - as if it were his will and pleasure to save or ruin you.  Do not fear those who can only touch your body, as if they could damn your soul; do not attribute to any creature God's sovereign and incommunicable power."

"The sinfulness of fear consists in its power to dispose and incline people to use sinful means to escape danger.  This casts them into the hands of temptation."

You are in our prayers.

Finger Thinking 122612

Luke 9:23 ESV
And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.

"AND follow me"

Consecutive?  Concurrent?

How do we read this admonition?  Is it steps?  One big "happening?"

Can we "follow" Him without His call?  Without self-denial?  Without daily taking up our cross?

His call makes me His.  "It is finished."  But even though His work is finished for me it is not finished in me.  The denial and the taking up are both part and parcel of the journey - the following of Him.

At least in my experience they are.

Everyday I find that I forget that I am His and not my own.  Perhaps I do that because I know that such a surrender may result in a loss of comfort and ease in my life here.  Perhaps I am afraid of that loss to too great a degree.  Perhaps I am yet too attached to me and my material ease and comfort.  Well - we both know there is no "perhaps" in it.  There is little question of my attachment and my struggle with it.

A poor man can be proud and possessive of his poverty.  He can cling to and depend upon what little he has and hoard it jealously.  He can clasp it in an iron hand refusing to let God remove it so that it might be replaced.  He indeed has a "death grip" upon what little he has.

The rich man may cling to all he has just a passionately as the poor man clings to his little.

But for most of us there is a middle place.  We will "give up" just so much before we begin to balk and sulk.  I know I do.  I find that I cling to too much even if it's just a little.  That "little" is mine and as long as it is, I think I am OK.  Of course, that in itself shows me that I have a long way to go.

Remember the poster of the kitten clinging to the limb?  Remember the caption, "Just hang in there?"  Well, that's where I find myself all too often.  I'm clinging to the dubious security I have (the limb) and refusing so let it go so that I might trust Him.  My "hanging in there" smacks too much of "hanging on to."

Now, on the other end of that stick is a "letting go" that's just as bad.  It's a self-motivated letting go - a proud and resentful - "Well, just take it all then!"  It's an angry and proud surrender (??) to God that really is no surrender at all.  It is more of a throwing whatever I do have back into God's face.  It isn't a pretty or a useful thing.

Paul wrote:
1 Timothy 6:6-8 ESV
Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, [7] for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. [8] But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.

So, there is no gain and perhaps even loss in godliness without contentment?  Mmmm, Ouch!  There certainly can be no true value in contentment without godiliness.

Ahhh but then there is vers 8.  Food and clothing = content.  Am I willing?  I can say that, but will I accept that?  Or, do I have a few other "buts," I'd like to throw in?  Oh how I wish I didn't!!!!  But, I know I do - even if I'm being very effective at not seeing them right now.

Here's my quandry.  What, if anything (stuff, aspirations, feelings, associations, $), does God want me to give up?  It is clear from the Gospels that following Him carried with it the very real potential of giving up stuff - but what do "I" need to give up?

Then, is it actually "stuff" He wants me to give up or is it an attitude, thought process, false belief, sinful fear---------?  I think of Job and I shiver.  Job has got me beat hands down!  Yet in his loss he struggles with everything but trusting God.  It's almost viscseral to read, "Even if He kills me, I will trust in Him."

Maybe the struggle is between having everything we want and being dead.  I feel like a petulant child fussing over surrendering toys I haven't played with in ages - "Well just take it all - all of it - I don't want any of it.  Why don't you just kill me?"

Wow - are you as suprised at the depth of my shallowness as I am?  And you know what's even more disturbing?  So far I haven't "lost" anything.  Oh, we can see potential even probable loss looming ahead of us but so far - we really haven't "lost" anything we've noticed.

Ok - maybe that's not true.  We have lost (or at least are losing - letting go of) trusting in others, even trusting in ourselves instead of Him.  We have faced the fact that "chariots" are not the answer.  We've lost that, "I'm counting on you," attitude towards others and ourselves.  We've discovered that "faith" belongs only in Him - not in friends, associates - not even those with whom and for whom we've sacrifced and worked and prayed.  "Chariots," can't work when the other option is Him.  And making aliances with "Egypt" won't work ethier.

We, like so many of you, are waiting - or at least struggling to wait - upon Him to do what we should depend upon Him alone to do.  We are getting to know the feeling David must have felt when those about him mocked asking, "Where's your God?"

Do you feel like the only answer to that mocking is, "I don't know."  Or perhaps an overly cocky, "He is there."  Or do you just pray no one asks you that quesiton?

Times are tough and I believe that especially for believers it will get tougher.  Yes, I mean that in a material way but it will also be a tough time for our faith and our faithfulness.

Not naked and not starving.  If that's what He has for me will I be faithful in it?  Right now, all I can say is that I want to be - I hope to be - but I will not do it by my own ability or power.  So, like many many of you, I sit and pray and wait, fighting myself to trust only in Him.

This and That: Pour it all out to God!

Pour out to God in prayer those fears which the devil and your own unbelief pour in upon you in times of danger. Prayer is the best outlet to fear: where is the Christian that cannot set his seal to this direction?   Flavel, John (2010-08-03). Keeping the Heart (Kindle Locations 669-670).

Psa 118:5 
Out of my distress I called on the LORD; the LORD answered me and set me free.  ESV

In times of danger – no matter its magnitude – fear is natural.  Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the acting upon it.  What greater thing could we do than to go to our Father with all our fears.

Isn’t Christ, our intercessor and Great High Priest, seated with the Father speaking of us and for us?  Does not Christ appreciate and understand our weaknesses and vulnerabilities’?

If, as we see in the quote above, Satan knows and exploits our fears, does not our Father know more and better?  In all things fearful is it not enough that nothing can separate us from the love of God?  Surely upon that assurance we can stand.

But we are weak as babes in our walk with Christ – as we should be. Though we lived in the wiles of the Devil and the fantasies of the flesh, we do not know living in the security and power of our Lord.  So we tremble and quake as Satan and our budding/immature faith both work to our distress.

Trusting God is not something that just comes.  It is gained by experience, informed by His Word and enhanced by His Spirit.  I have trusted God in many situations and yet every new situation raises the hair on the back of my neck.

I wonder, “God was faithful there and then but this is here and now.”  Even though I know that when it was then and there for me, He was already readying here and now for me.  But I still fear.

I’ve noticed something, though, about that fear.  It is characterized by the question, “What am I (or we) going to do”?  Perhaps that’s where we get tripped up.  We face a circumstance and supposing we must or can do something, we start with ourselves.  Seeing no help for or in ourselves, we fear.  Because we are already afraid we think we don’t have faith.  Because we think we don’t have faith we doubt God will help us.

Perhaps we’re starting at the wrong place.  Perhaps we need to take the circumstance (and our fear) to Him immediately and ask Him what we need to do (if anything).  Perhaps we need to slow down, examine the circumstance and take our thoughts and concerns to Him and have a talk. 

I wonder if at times I irritate Him (LOL).  I try to take circumstances to Him and leave them with Him but it doesn’t work very well.  I’ve found that I need to stay before Him and take the time to pour out my ideas and thoughts concerning the circumstance.  If I don’t, I find myself fretting and distracted.  So I try to go to Him and just babble out my ideas, my tangential concerns, my solutions, my fears.  It seems that this process has a quieting effect on my soul.

But just recently, I’ve discovered that I rise from prayer too swiftly.  I’ll pray and then get into bed and I’ll just go on trying to fix the problem in my head.  I think that, at those times, I need to get back on my knees and continue the conversation – obviously, I wasn’t done (or maybe He wasn’t). 

Ok – for those of you who are thinking, “Do I have to be on my knees,”  I’ll just tell you that I do.  As I’ve intentionally worked on my prayer life, I’ve discovered that it just feels more like prayer when I’m kneeling.  Do I have to?  I don’t think I have to for Him – but I do for me.  That’s just me – and we all know I’m just not right. 
Prayer is worship – but it is conversational worship.  I speak, He listens.  How He responds is unclear to me – I haven’t heard voices yet.  But I trust Him to respond because He always has.  Either through the Word, a change of circumstance, another believer, a random sermon I hear, a random book I read, or even a random thought, He answers.  Oh, I know none of those things are really “random.”  They are intentional and purposeful – so maybe utterly unexpected is a better term.  But the point is, He answers.

Concerning the verse I used above.  Notice that the writer says that God set him free.  The term distress has the sense of “tightness,” like when your chest gets tight when you are anxious.  Now the writer doesn’t say what his freedom looked like.  Was the circumstance changed or was his anxiety relieved?  But would we complain of either?  I hope not.

Don’t let yourself think that you should only do this for the “big stuff.”  Make it a habit to do it with everything.  “Pour,” it all out to God.  What seems trivial today may loom large tomorrow, so you may as well get a head start on it. 

This and That – Flavel & Fear - 082712

I just finished J. Flavel’s classic, The Mystery of Providence, and then I found his work, Triumphing Over Sinful Fear.  Had to take my Pastor to task for that – he told me about the work on Providence but not the one on Fear.  I have to wonder what other treasures he’s hiding (laugh-out-loud –hahaha).

Anyway – this version of the book I am reading is a well “modernized” edition – so the 17^th century language hurdle isn’t there.

Fear is “gooba”- that’s good and bad.  Flavel presents us with three kinds of fear.

Natural fear “It is the trouble or agitation of mind that arises when we perceive approaching evil or impending danger. It is not always sinful, but it is always the fruit and consequence of sin.  Natural fear is a pure and simple passion of the soul.”

Religious fear:  “There is a holy and laudable fear, which is our treasure, not our torment.  But the awful, filial fear of God is the natural passion sanctified—changed and baptized into the name and nature of a spiritual grace.”

Sinful fear:  “Arises from unbelief—an unworthy distrust of God.  Sinful fear is the disordered and corrupt passion of the soul.”

Flavel, John (2011-12-27). Triumphing Over Sinful Fear (Puritan Treasures for Today) Reformation Heritage Books. Kindle Edition.

I’m really excites about getting into this book.  Fear is a biggy for a lot of us especially in these terrible times.  There are so many things we all face and they loom so very BIG in our minds and hearts.  A focused study concerning fear can only help us grow and be strengthened.

I was reflecting on God’s provision yesterday and I was getting a little anxious about our needs when it hit me.  Yesterday – we had everything we needed!  We didn’t lack for anything. 

Then the little voices in my head started to go to work.  Sins of the past, stupid moves, unfaithfulness – all of that began to squeeze my heart.  Realizing where this came from (the dark one) I began to respond with all the grace and mercy God has and is pouring out on Patti and me. 

Oh, I agreed with those voices about each and every accusation.  However I responded with, “But Jesus…………”  What a powerful moment!  No heavenly chorus, no feeling of warmth or light just a quietness and sense of comfort.  Sure – every sin that was brought to my mind was tight on the money.  But when the voices started to tell me that because of them God was punishing me I refused to buy it – by the blood of the Redeemer.  I made it plain that God is disciplining us but that there was no punishment!

Fear can cripple.  Fear can tear down.  Fear can distract us from grace and mercy.  Fear can make us question God’s might and love.  But only if we do not remember whose we are and what he has done, is doing and can do.

When fear assaults us it is good to remember all He has done.  At the end of Flavel’s book on Providence he strongly recommends keeping a journal or some sort of record of Gods provisions, past and present.  OK – I am a writer but I’ve always felt a little dumb doing a journal thing.  But, in faith, I started. 

I carry a little notebook in my back pocket and my trusty “space-pen” in another pocket and I make a simple not of His provision(s).  It’s not a “Dear diary” thing.  I just make a short note; a name, a time, whatever.  Just enough for me to remember.  I also mark my notes.  I use a “!” for praise/thanksgiving, a “?” for concerns, a (-) for needs and a (+) for good stuff (I have a lot of “!+” in my notebook.

This has made a powerful difference for me as I go through the day.  And at night as Patti and I kneel for prayer I am ready to offer both praise and petition from a knowing place. 

I’m probably going to add some mark like ($) to record the fears that come to mind as well.  I picked the $ sign because that seems to be a real sharp stick for me. 

I can’t give a glowing recommendation for Flavel’s book on Fear since I haven’t read all of it – but if it is anything like his work on Providence – WOW!

I’ve created me a little “thing” I will use when I am afraid.  I’ve based it upon a scripture text.

Jesus said:

Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.  Mat 10:31

So, when fear comes I will “Fear” and examine the cause of the fear – if it is natural or religious fear – then I will prayerfully deal with it.   If it is sinful fear then I will “not.”  Fear----Not!

I’m also trying to think like a sparrow - ;-}}}}}}}

Why wait till I'm dead?

Some of the letters of John Newton were published after he went "home."  These have always been a true blessing to me and I have often wondered how many more would have been blessed had they been published in his life-time.  But - He is sovereign.


I believe that if we are without practical applications for the beliefs we hold then holding those beliefs is, well, frustrating and just bad.  But we have long surrendered the true meaning of disciple and have found quick fix programs and seminars more to our liking.  This is a fact I mourn and well, despise.  So we're gonna do some disciple training here - intermittently, intimately and dynamically. 


The following set the circumstances and presents some of the problems.  Join in - jump in.  The catalyst for doing this has been prayer, conviction and Richard Sibbes' book, The Soul's Conflict With Itself.  Walk with us but remember, ministry is messy.  If this is not your cup of tea just pass them by.

Come, walk with us ----

In most of the passages in scripture that deal with perseverance it is in relation to persecution and/or temptation.  At this point in our sojourn Patti and I are facing trials which have little to do with persecution or temptations are none the less frightening and pressing.  So I’ve chosen to do a little finger thinking and share with you what I am learning – or need to learn.  I can’t get more practical in my writing than that.

Of course, like it is for so many of you times are tough.  A recent serious decease in out income has put us in a tenuous (to say the least) positron.  As a tent-maker I have rarely sough the support of others although there have been and are some kind souls who have shared with us to help in meeting our needs.

Right now the temptation is to either fight or flee.   To either take the bull by the horns or just run away.  The desire to “fix” it is one of the biggest problems.  The flesh in it’ incessant bid for control conjures up all kind of schemes and ideas and vaporous imaginings.  It also encourages one to rail at God and others about how we’ve served and not we suffer (OK – it feels like suffering but that is relative).

The temptation to cry out “Where are you?” both to God an others is very strong but from the bitterness and arrogance I can detect underneath that impulse it is very clear it is from the flesh.  He and others have been there.  He and some are still there.  But when one has a sense of drowning, rational reflection is very very difficult.

Another temptation is to be over burdened with blame.  To play the, “I should have…” game on myself.  The thoughts that had I only stayed in law enforcement or if I had only gone on in  my education to be a psychologist/counselor haunts me.  I look back at the decision to take up the ministry I believed I was called to and have feelings of shame and guilt.  Being the head of my household just makes it worse.

Then there is the lovely thought (sarcasm) that Patti would be better off without me and that if she’d just move and live with some of her family her life would be better.  She certainly deserves better.  She has sacrificed and is firm in her conviction that we (that is I) have done the right thing and that I should continue.  But the little voices tell me she loves me and want to encourage men and that though this is sweet it’s just her being nice.

Of course then we have to figure in the embarrassment of what may come as well as the losses.  The potential losses aren’t so bad for us – we’ve got too much “stuff” and if we could have a monster yard sale I don’t think we’d miss much of what went.   As long as I don’t even consider selling Patti’s mom’s Chinese vases I’m safe ;-}.

Pride – pride has never been such a monster for me.  Harboring that silly thought that somehow I am in charge and this shouldn’t be happening and all that “stuff” steals precious moments from each day keeping me from prayer and study and writing. 

Then there’s that slithery thought that I have been wrong – very wrong in thinking that such a weird and chaotic ministry could ever have come from Him.  I await that invisible committee that comes with a chorus of either, “We could have told you..” or “We never thought it was a real “ministry” anyway – we just considered it your delusion – your error.”  And of course there’s that other comment/thought, “You should have gotten a REAL job.”

Yes, the flesh is alive and well in me.  Of course I knew that – I know that.  The hard part is to discern where the flesh is using truth to drive me more towards myself and from God. 

It’s kind of funny that I should have been reading Richard’s Sibbes’ work, The Soul’s Conflict With itself; And Victory Over Itself By Faith.  That’s the book I’ve made so many FB posts from.

I told Patti that had it not been for reading that book and the scriptures referenced I would have yielded to the flesh instead of resisting it.  I’ll share with you (more briefly than here) as we move through this time.  I hope to be candid and honest for your benefit and to help me see what’s going on in my heart and mind as well.

Sibbes wrote:  “Ignorance, being darkness, is full of false fears. In the night time men think every bush a thief.”  Sibbes, Richard (2012-04-24). The Soul's Conflict With Itself: And Victory Over Itself By Faith. (pp. 47-48). A Puritan At Heart Press. Kindle Edition.

So, with your indulgence, I’ll share with you as I work on dispelling the ignorance/darkness that my flesh seeks to impose and grow.

Your prayers are of course greatly desired.  Though your counsel, encouragement and consolation would be a great blessing please remember that in the dark, all cats are grey.

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved,

compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience,

(Col 3:12)

Sometimes - that's all there is-------

Listening to Rich Mullins "My Deliverer Is Coming."

Right now

Today

That's all there is

That's all that's keeping it in the road

But

Really

That's all the ever kept it in the road

That all that will ever keep it in the road

I'm OK with that

How about you?

Anxiety 2.0

Php 4:6  Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  NASB

Anxious:  μεριμνάω  merimnaō

1) to be anxious

1a) to be troubled with cares

2) to care for, look out for (a thing)

2a) to seek to promote one’s interests

2b) caring or providing for

There is a related word that we ought to attend to as well:  μερίζω  merizō.  This work means to divide, to split into factions; to be disunited.  The reason I include merizō is that it gives a clearer sense of what we’re being told in this verse.  This word carried the idea of being distracted – diverted from the course set.

It is normal to be “anxious” – is it not?  Are we not told that we will be hated and have tribulation?  Are we not told we are engaged in a war?  Are we not warned of Satan’s desire to entrap and impale us?  How then could we never be anxious?

If you want to get hard core we are told here to “Be anxious,” but to be anxious for nothing 

But – that aside, we need to understand that the point here is to enjoin us to not be “disunited,” or as my grandfather would say, “discombobulated” for nothing.  We are not to let anything distract us from, well, the faith.

OK – for the rookies.  I want you to remember that the Christ did not die to make life here a party – or even nice.  He died so that we might be redeemed into God’s family and have the assurance of eternal life with Him.  That’s what we cannot afford to be distracted from. 

We should also remember that God’s desire for us here is to grow in righteousness.  He does not want us to be distracted from that either.  The anxiety He presents here in Phil. Is an anxiety that distracts us from those truths and make other things of equal or greater importance and concern.

I know a man who is struggling with anxiety over his circumstances.  Work, money, the future all seem to loom over him pressing him down.  The constant battle he faces is in trying to work it out, figure it out, fix it, etc. apart from his dependence upon God.  The shame and humiliation that would attend the worst case scenario plaques most of his waking moments, even his dreams.  A sense of a wasted life, uselessness and failure rise up in his throat like bile.

He’s afraid to do anything because the thought keeps running in his head that if he does the wrong thing, God will smack him.  All of his past errors and sin raise their ugly heads to accuse and offer proof of his unfitness for God’s blessing.  In his anxiety, he is frozen. 

He wants to pray but feels that would be disingenuous.  He has thoughts of ramping up his practices, good works, prayer, stewardship – but he knows that comes from the wrong direction.  The subtle thought that if he just does X God will rescue him freezes his mind and heart.

This is the anxiety of which Paul writes.  I had one person describe it as feeling like what it must be like to be water-boarded.  It’s a paralyzing, smothering sense of distress. 

Knowing his redemption is sure; Knowing that he is a child of God; Knowing that God works all thing for the good of those who love him, he still struggles desperately though quietly; all the while pushing forward to meet his obligations and commitments. 

He yearns to be with the Lord but even here it is dangerous.  To be with the Lord one must shuffle off this mortal coil.  Yet he knows that perhaps he wants more to be out of his circumstances than to be - well – dead.  So he even questions his desire for God and the eternal life Christ purchased for him.

He does not trust his own mind and struggles with God entrusting him because of his failures.  Oh, he knows these are all the strategies of the world, the flesh and the Devil but knowing the source doesn’t reduce the injury. 

He fights being “distracted,” or “diverted,” rom the course set before him.  He struggles with every fiber of his being to push through the darkness and dismay.  Like the prophet he would sit under a tree and invite God to take his life.  Like Job he would scorn the day of his birth.

There is no “cure” for his anxiety, only an alternative.

“but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God”

Interestingly he does not struggle with being thankful.  He knows all he has to be thankful for.  It is the nature and content of his requests that concern him.  He wants to pray for what he needs but what he thinks he needs smacks too much of what he wants.  He wants to ask for the right thing but he does not trust his thoughts on what the right thing is.  What should he request?

Now, for you and me, what he should pray for may be clear and simple.  Homey but true, “It’s hard to remember the job was to drain the swamp when you’re up to your behind in alligators.”  We also have to remember that one man’s gecko is another man’s alligator.

Then we find:

Rom 8:26-27  In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words;  (27)  and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.

That, then, is his only active hope.  Unable to trust himself, his heart, his mind, he must trust the Spirit of God to untangle all the “stuff” and to present to God those groanings.  Yes, sometimes we need to “be still.”  Not just to hear from God but to speak to Him as well.

“Being still,” isn’t easy.  We need to pray to be still.  When our minds and hearts a racing, when we are hard pressed inside and out being still is as hard as turning the other cheek – perhaps harder.

The real distressing part of this is that we are not prone to carry these burdens to the Body.  There is too much of a stigma attached.  Not only that, but there is often nothing available except shallow platitudes or castigation.  So in these circumstances the individual is left to deal with it alone.  All too often – most often – this results in a catastrophe of faith.

Yes, I know that the Romans verse is followed by:

Rom 8:28  And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

This is indeed a great and true assurance but like children who have suffered an injury the assurance that, “It will be OK,” doesn’t stop the pain or quell the fear.

Any thoughts?